Wednesday, July 20, 2011

…and then I was poor

For this new and wonderful adventure I've begun making and selling (hopefully) invitations and such on Etsy, I figured a key piece of equipment to buy was a printer.  I *thought* this was going to be a simple venture.  Go to Best Buy, touch all the printers and then buy one that felt the best.  Do as little research as possible.  Well that plan failed…FAILED.  In fact this was probably one of the most complicated printer buying experiences ever, and I use to work for Best Buy!

The beginning:
I knew there were two types of printers, laser and ink jet.  Ink jet = soggy paper = water damage look = not so good for invitations.  Ok laser it is!  I went to Best Buy, as per my plan, and found 12 ink jets and 1, let me repeat that ONE laser printer. ONE!!! I wish there were more letters in ONE so I could exaggerate it more.  Clearly Best Buy was not the place for me.

The investigation:
I went to the internet – oh wise, all knowing box of information, inform me!  I realized quickly that there are a TON of laser printers out there, oh but they’re all black and white only.  No color.  Awesome, well I’ll add that to my list of requirements: laser printer, color.  Then the thought occurred to me that I need a printer that can handle cardstock.  Guess what, most printers don’t like cardstock, or even like the word cardstock.  No idea why but they don’t.  Thick paper, sure, thicker paper, no problem just don’t use that word…cardstock.

Reverting back to Plan A:
After research I knew it was going to be either an HP or a Brother printer, but I just couldn’t get over the fact that I wanted to touch the printer and bring it home with me that night.  You know like when you go to the pound to “look” at the animals and then fall in love with the one that keeps jumping up at you and head butting you in the leg and then you just can’t help but bring it home with you….I mean uh... I have no idea what you're talking about...any way, where was I? Oh yes, I drove all the way to the South Bay to look at printers at Fry’s with my friend Doug.   When it comes to technology, as much as I hate to admit this, he’s pretty well informed (don’t tell him I said that!). Now Fry’s had waaay more printers than Best Buy. I’d say close to 60 printers, but guess how many were laser…six.  SIX!! (dangit! another short number word!) Only three of which were color.  I went back and forth between two options and finally turned to Doug and said, what would you do!?  To which he responded “… more research.”  UG!!!!

Dangit! I hate you Plan B:
 Back to the internet I went.  Consumer Reports in hand.  I talked to the IT guys at work for their opinion, I emailed back and forth with Doug for his two cents.  What do you mean HP printers only have a 600 x 600 resolution in my price range!?  I’m printing invitations!! I need something with quality!  Finally… FINALLY I find a printer that is a laser printer, is color, has a resolution of 2400 x 600, and takes both thick paper and thicker paper.  HOORAY it’s done!! Everyone agrees that yes, this is a good printer.

The universe is against me:
And then it arrived.  I didn’t want an expensive printer sitting on the porch at my house until I got home at 6pm so I had it delivered to work.  It is the most cumbersome sized box ever!  The IT team had to help me carry it to the car.  I had to pick up my friend Jenita so she could help me carry it into the house (clearly she is way stronger than me because she carried it up the stairs like she was carrying a box of pillows).  I went to the company website to see how much the printer weighs and IN BOX its only FIFTY SIX POUNDS (finally a number I can really write out!). Oh and BTW, they’re having a sale this week, this printer (that I just bought from not the manufacturer), is $100 off and shipping is FREE!  Awesome, just awesome.  You couldn't have had the sale LAST WEEK.  Thanks universe for that one!

Research Fail:
Just when I think it’s all over, it’s safe to just be done, I mistakenly look at the ‘supplies and accessories’ tab.  I was double checking the price of toner and see that there is something called a drum unit ($130) and a waste toner box ($30) and don’t forget the belt unit ($140) all of which will need to be replaced in the next 50,000 pages.. WAIT WHAT!?  As if $45 a color for toner wasn’t enough you have to charge me hundreds of dollars more for replacement parts!?  *slaps forehead!

Needless to say, I now have a printer.  Next time I have to buy a printer I’m just going to hire someone to do it for me.  In some Best Buy Stores they have personal shoppers, I just need to find one and get them to do this for me.  Now all I need is for people to start buying invitations to justify this purchase so I don’t feel like I spent a MAGILLION dollars on a FOURTY SIX POUND paper weight (now I’m just writing all numbers in caps because it’s fun).  Hooray for printers!

No comments: